people thougt they noe me

wat if they dun rili noe me..,
but pretend lik they do..


im crying..
inside n outside..
i dont noe why im confused!
sumone please gimme a tight slap..!
or a nice kick on my ass..,
shit!
i feel like one..
cant it just let go?
so dat i could be miserable my whole freaking life?
n so dat it could be with sumone better, far better n perfecter than me..
why does it happen to me?
all my friends didnt get into this kind of mess..
im all messed up now..,
i never intend to make it suffer..,
never want to see it gets hurt..
is it selfish of me,
if i dont want myself to get hurt and
live as a true masochist?